I don’t want to come off as an asshole when I say I’ve never given a shit about the fourth of July but that’s basically what I’m saying here.
I like BBQ’s and sparklers and seeing my friends. I like smores, bonfires and beer. I cannot say however that I have ever truly associated any of these activities as a celebration of America. I realize that is supposed to be the purpose however it has never been heavily present in my mind. If anything my favorite part of Fourth of July is getting fireworks illegally from out of state. My favorite part of this holiday celebrating my country is breaking the law?
Upon pondering this further I come to think well isn’t this my attitude toward all holidays? I sure as hell don’t think about a baby Jesus at Christmas. To me that is a holiday of family gathering and time of appreciation. Thanksgiving is a big cooking contest and group meal. Easter for me has always been a celebration of Rabbits, candy and cute animals in general.
What are my two favorite Holidays? Halloween and New Years eve. You just want to get drunk, some may protest. However, no, for me these Holidays are what they stand for. Halloween is an excuse to be fun and wild and free. It’s ok to dress up in an absurdity and show your creativity without getting any dirty looks. It’s about embracing the unspoken taboos of our society and acknowledging death as most people seem to live their lives pretending it will never strike. I find this silly. Death is the only true certainty in life. I like to remember death everyday because it reminds me to live, to make the most of every second, to appreciate even the small things because life in this universe is a rare wonderful gift.
Upon New Years one hopes for a fun party with friends, although I will admit, I’ve had far better luck with Halloween. Upon New Years I actually do take the time to reflect upon my previous year. I really do set goals for myself and try to make positive life changes. I do this continuously throughout the year anyway but New Years is still a big goal push for me. It really is, to me, a possibility for new changes. A fresh breath of cold air when you wake up one morning. Everyday is a new day and I like that there is a holiday which might embody this idea. Human beings should be ever evolving creatures. I have always felt this way. We should always keep growing changing learning. Once you get settled become closed minded, that to me is when you really begin to die.
Back to the fourth of July. Red White and Blue flags waving in the air. Sparklers and lightning bugs. Fireworks and hotdogs. This 4th of July, a Thirsty Thursday night, I should be going to a hookah bar with Huber friends. This weekend I spend the 6th moving stuff to Columbus. I want to bring my desk and chair. This may be difficult as a certain guy doesn’t seem to want to help me. The night of the 6th will be a 4th of July party at Sullys house. My final party with the Huber kids as a Huber kid. Sure I’ll go to other parties but from then on I’ll be a guest in town. I’ll be an outsider in town only for a visit. The 7th I’ll take another load of stuff and spend my first night in my new apartment.
It’s scary but right now I’m more worried about paying bills than making new friends. The first month or two will be rough, school will be rough. However this change of scenery, these new bigger opportunities, this new start… has been long overdue.